Wondering about penis size? Is 6.5 inches small? Is it big? In this article we’ll break down how a 6.5 inch penis compares to the general population. We’ll also discuss what a 6.5 inch penis—or any size penis, really—means for you in terms of you (and your partner’s) sexual pleasure and function. We also have advice for you if you’re feeling down about your size.
Note: We are aware that not everyone with a penis identifies as a man (and not everyone with a vagina identifies as a woman). We have tried to keep the language as inclusive as possible.
Is 6.5 Inches Big or Small?
The scientific community has actually devoted a lot of energy to measuring penises. This means we have a pretty good idea of how a penis that is 6.5 inches long compares to the general population.
Note that when we discuss penis measurements, we are typically talking about how long a penis is when erect. Some flaccid penises grow a lot when they become erect, while others only grow a little. So it’s easiest to compare erect or stretched penis lengths.
The most up-to-date research on penis length comes from a systematic review published in the British Journal of Urology called, “Am I Normal?” In this review, researchers analyzed studies that included 15,521 penises in total and found that the average length of an erect penis is about 5.17 inches. The average girth (distance around the erect penis) is about 4.59 inches.
This comprehensive analysis accords with previous smaller studies. These have typically found an average erect penis length from 5.1 to 5.6 inches. Psychology Today also reports (based on previous research) that 68% of penises are 4.6 to 6.0 inches when erect.
Significantly, the researchers in the BJU study only included studies in which health professionals measured the penises. They excluded studies where individuals self-reported penis length. This is important because it appears that when people self-report penis length, they exaggerate the length by up to half an inch. Studies that use this methodology are likely to end up with averages slightly greater than the reality.
Note that most, but not all, of the people in the BJU meta-analysis were of European descent. However, the idea that there is a connection between ethnicity and penis size is a racist idea based on very unreliable data that has been thoroughly debunked.
So the average penis is about 5.2 inches when erect. But what about the more extreme ends of the scale?
Well, in the BJU study, the researchers found that only 5% of penises were greater than 6.3 inches when erect. Similarly, only 5% of penises were smaller than 3.94 inches when erect. The vast majority of penises, then, fall in the 4-6 inch range when erect.
So is 6.5 inches small? Definitely not. In fact, it means that less than 5% of penises are bigger than yours when erect.
So is a 6.5 inch penis big? Compared to the average, yes, a 6.5 inch dick is big.
Is 6.5 Inches Good?
So you know now that by most measurements, a 6.5 inch penis is above average length. In fact, it’s probably in the top 5% of all penises!
But is 6.5 inches a “good” penis size? That’s a much more complicated question, laden with value judgments and cultural baggage. We’ll address two facets of this question here: penis size and sexual satisfaction, and penis size and masculinity.
Is 6.5 Inches Enough Sexually?
Sometimes when people ask “what is a good penis size,” what they are really wondering is if their penis is sufficiently satisfying for their sexual partners.
No matter the size of your penis, your partner is probably fine with it. In a 2006 survey of heterosexual men and women, 85% of the women polled felt satisfied with the size of their partner’s member. And when specifically asked about what contributes to sexual satisfaction, very few women mention penis size.
So why are most of these women totally fine with whatever their partner is packing? This is likely for three major reasons:
Penetration Isn’t the Most Important Thing
First, only about one-quarter of women can reliably reach orgasm through penetration (typical penis-in-vagina intercourse). Thus, most women are not able to orgasm from penetration alone. This makes the length of the partner’s penis much less relevant for a woman’s sexual pleasure.
But what is relevant? Clitoral stimulation. When most women masturbate, they don’t penetrate themselves. They stimulate the external part of the clitoris, which is how most women derive most of their sexual pleasure.
The bottom line is that whether a woman (or any person) enjoys a sexual experience or not depends a lot more on what her partner does and if that person is attentive to her needs than on her partner’s anatomy. (Case in point, perhaps: lesbians have more orgasms than straight or bisexual women, and their sexual encounters tend to be much longer in duration). This is all to say that for the most part, how to please a particular partner sexually is something that has to be learned, and the starting size of your equipment doesn’t make a huge difference one way or the other.
There are also some aspects of vaginal anatomy that make penis size relatively unimportant for most women. First, the vagina is pretty elastic, which means it can stretch (or not stretch) to fit pretty much any penis size unless that penis is very small or very large. There’s certainly variation in how much a given vagina can expand, but they are all stretchy.
Second, only the first third of the vagina experiences a lot of sensation, as most vaginal nerve endings are concentrated there. This means that to the extent that women have penis size preferences, they are centered much more on girth (how thick around the penis is when erect) than length. A girthy, shorter penis provides more sensation to the sensitive first section of the vagina than a longer, skinnier penis. (Remember, the average girth is around 4.6 inches). Additionally, a girthier penis increases the chances that the friction of penetration will stimulate the clitoris.
Personality Is More Important
Another reason for the relative unimportance of penis size is that relationships are about a lot more than the superficial! This may seem fairly obvious, but when surveyed about evaluating potential partners, women care more about a man’s personality than superficial, appearance-based traits. This also goes back to the idea that giving sexual pleasure to a particular partner is something that is usually learned in the context of that sexual relationship. Personality, on the other hand, is a lot less mutable.
What About Size Queens?
However, this is not to say that there are no women out there who really care about size. A small proportion of women do care about penis length. Based on survey data this is probably between around one in eight to one in five women, depending on the sample and how the question is worded.
Interestingly, women who do care about greater penis length are more likely to be ones who can reliably orgasm from penetration. This suggests that if you can usually reach orgasm from penetration, penis length makes a difference. But most women don’t have terribly strong penis length preferences.
It’s also worth noting that some women actually prefer smaller penises, as accommodating a larger penis can require more effort to stretch out the vagina. There’s also a greater possibility of cervical bruising, vaginal tears, and other painful consequences.
What About Gay Men?
There’s not tons of research on gay men, penis size, and sex, but some data suggests that unfortunately, gay men may experience more penis size prejudice from potential partners than straight men. A poll conducted in the UK found that about 1 in 5 gay men had rejected someone because of their penis size. And while about half of the men said that size doesn’t matter, another third said that it does. Penis size also appears to be at least somewhat associated with how often a person takes the penetrator (“top”) or receptive (“bottom”) role in homosexual contexts.
The Bottom Line on Penis Size and Sexual Satisfaction
Will having a smaller-than-average penis size potentially limit your choice of sex partners? Perhaps slightly. But then again, having a substantially larger-than-average penis size can also limit your choice of partner, as there are definitely people who actively avoid large penises. Additionally, some sex acts may be easier or more enjoyable for your partner if you do have a smaller penis, like performing oral sex or receiving anal sex. All genitals are a little bit different and that’s totally fine.
If someone rejects you or makes fun of you for the size of your equipment, it says bad things about them, not you.
And regardless of your sexual orientation, you can have mutually pleasurable sexual encounters no matter what size your penis is (see the next section for even more on this).
Is 6.5 Inches Manly Enough?
Some men aren’t as worried about the sexual aspects of penis size. Instead, they may worry that if their penises aren’t big enough, they aren’t enough of a man. They may feel that “not big enough” means “not good enough.”
The truth is that the “goodness” of a given penis size is not at all objective and is primarily determined by cultural values. Different sorts of penises have been viewed as “better” during different eras and in different places.
Our culture’s current fascination with large penises has led many men to feel inadequate about their size, even when it’s well within the normal range. In many ways, the penis has been equated with masculinity, which makes many people feel like more must be better. It doesn’t help that porn usually features far larger than average penises. (You should take porn penises with a grain of salt—camera tricks are used to make them look as large as possible, and some performers even wear prosthetic penises.)
In the same 2006 study where 85% of women said they were satisfied with their partner’s penis size, 66% of heterosexual men surveyed thought their own penis was average, 22% thought it was large, and only 12% thought it was small. And yet, only 55% of those men felt satisfied with the size of their penis. Even average isn’t considered “enough.” And most men who seek penis enlargement have “normal” penis length (within the average range). This just shows how skewed our cultural ideas about acceptable penis size are: many men view the average as small.
Men may be especially self-conscious about the size of their flaccid penis because that’s what they are covertly comparing in locker rooms as they grow up. Men also often think that their own penises are smaller than they are because they are looking down at them all the time. This may make the member appear smaller compared to a head-on look. So they are comparing totally different perspectives on the penis when they try to size themselves up against other men in the locker room.
And of course, penises “grow” by dramatically different amounts when they become erect. You can tell next to nothing about how large a penis is when erect when it’s flaccid.
The bottom line, however, is that penis size does not actually say anything about how manly you are. This is a cultural myth.
However, that doesn’t mean that these myths can’t be hard to overcome. See the next section for more on what to do if you feel very self-conscious about your size.
So, is 6.5 inches good? The bottom line is that there’s no “good” or “bad” penis size. Whatever penis size you have, whether it’s 2 inches or 10 inches, there is nothing wrong with it. Additionally, it is definitely possible for you to find someone who is perfectly content with the size of your member. More importantly, it’s possible for you to make peace with the size of your member!
Help! I Feel Bad About My Penis Size
Are you feeling bad about your penis size? We have suggestions in the next sections to help you have optimal sexual and social function, whether your penis is 6.5 inches long or 3.5. We’ve divided this into three sections: options for addressing sexual situations, options for directly addressing your penis size, and options for addressing your feelings about penis size.
Penis Size and Sexual Situations
If your primary concern with penis size is being a satisfactory sexual partner, here are some strategies you can use to help increase your confidence in approaching sex. Some of these tips are more focused on heterosexual pairings (especially with regards to positions and devices), but most apply regardless of your sexual orientation.
Get to Know People Better First
If you feel a lot of anxiety or self-consciousness about your penis size, casual sex with people you don’t know well may not be the best choice for your psychological health. This is not because casual sex is necessarily bad; whether casual sex is positive or negative for well-being tends to depend on moderating factors.
However, people do tend to feel more nervous in sexual encounters with people they don’t know well. If you are already feeling anxious about your own penis size and whether it is sexually adequate, you may feel even more anxiety in a casual sexual encounter than the average person, which can impact your performance. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy: you’re anxious about your ability to please a partner, and your anxiety causes you to have trouble getting or maintaining an erection. This is very normal; anxiety is one of the primary determinants of erectile dysfunction issues. Unfortunately, it’s also a feedback loop, where a negative experience causes the anxiety associated with sexual performance to increase.
Thus, you may want to get to know people a little longer before you become sexually intimate with them. That way you will feel more comfort and trust with your partner, which will help lessen your anxiety and improve your sexual performance. Then you will feel more confidence going into the sexual encounter knowing that your partner finds you desirable as a whole person. This may help you to be less focused on your own anxieties about penis size and whether or not you are adequate.
Communicate With Your Partner
Ultimately, the key to good sex no matter what your genitals look like or what size they are is communicating with your partner. People take pleasure from different things. Thus, the only way to know what your partner likes is to talk to them about it. Don’t just assume that you know what they like or that what worked on other partners will work for them. Instead, ask what they like and be receptive to what they say.
It may also be helpful to move away from the attitude that penetration until the insertive partner comes is the de facto centerpiece of sex. For many people, oral sex and other forms of intimacy are as important as or more important to their pleasure than penetration. Remember: you are capable of giving your partner the kind of pleasure that they want. You just have to listen to what they want and be flexible in how you can deliver it.
Take Advantage of Different Positions
Whether you are concerned that your penis is too small or too large, getting creative with positioning is a great way to accommodate you and your partner’s pleasure.
For Smaller Penises:
If your partner is interested in penetration and one or both of you is looking for that fuller feeling during penetration, there are a number of sex positions that you can use to help with that. Some notable positions include ones where the receptive partner keeps their legs close together (or even crossed at the ankles) for a tighter fit. Here are a few articles on sex positions with smaller penises to give you some ideas:
- Bustle offers an article on 6 Sex Positions for Smaller Penises with helpful cartoon illustrations.
- Refinery29 has a slideshow with sex positions and other sexual advice for deep penetration with smaller penises.
- This Romper article suggests 9 best sex positions for smaller penises. There’s some overlap with the other articles, but there are some new suggestions, too.
Many of these positions would be totally impossible with a larger penis. So instead of thinking of your small penis as a disadvantage, consider all of the possibilities it opens up for you!
For Larger Penises:
If you have a larger penis, you may be concerned with making sure that your partner is comfortable and that you don’t hurt them during sex.
The vagina stretches, but this process takes time and deep arousal. Lots of foreplay and lube are both strategies that can help your partner accommodate your penis.
There are also some positions you can use with a larger penis that will help your partner feel most comfortable. In general, positions where your partner has more control over the depth and speed of penetration are most comfortable. Here are a couple of articles with recommendations:
- Sex-tip standby Cosmopolitan offers five positions from the pretty simple to the fairly athletic for the well-endowed.
- Refinery29 offers a few positions and tips for large penises, too.
Introduce Devices and Toys
Devices and toys can help increase your partner’s pleasure whether you have a large or small penis.
If Your Penis Is on the Larger Side
Putting a wide cock ring (or even two rings) around the base of your penis can help limit the amount that you can thrust up into your partner. This can help if too-deep penetration is an issue. Just be careful not to leave it on too long.
The more aroused your partner is, the easier it will be for them to accommodate your penis. Using a vibrator externally on a female partner either before or during penetration (or both) can help heighten her arousal and increase her comfort during penetration.
If Your Penis Is on the Smaller Side
Cock rings are also good for smaller penises, as they can make an erection harder. Using a narrower cock ring can help increase your partner’s sensation of fullness without losing length. Just don’t leave a cock ring on too long!
Vibrators can help supplement your partner’s pleasure. If you partner with women, introducing a small clitoral vibe will help your partner orgasm during penetration. Additionally, some vibrators (like the Rianne S Duo Vibe) are designed to easily allow for dual penetration with your penis and the vibrator. The combination of your penis and a vibrator inside your partner at the same time will provide a sensation of increased girth.
You can also wear penis sleeves and extenders to increase length and girth for penetration. Find one that feels good to both of you!
Are you feeling bad about the idea of introducing a device? Social conditioning often tells men that just their penis and nothing else should always be enough to please their partner. But as we’ve discussed, people get pleasure from lots of different things. Being a good partner is more about fulfilling your partner’s desires than having some kind of bionic super-penis.
Additionally, humans have been including technology in sex for generations. Ever used a condom or lube? Does your partner take birth control? Technology is already a part of your sex life!
Addressing Penis Size Directly
Now we’ll briefly discuss some ways that people have tried to directly augment penis size. Is it possible to get a 6.5 inch penis (or larger) with things like supplements, medical devices, or surgery? Should you consider these things?
There is no evidence that any male enhancement supplement (like Virectin) or topical treatment can make your penis larger. And many of these supplements have ingredients that can be dangerous to your health. Stay away from these!
Penis Pumps, Weights, and Stretching Devices
Various devices purport to pump or stretch your penis to make it larger. The evidence on these devices is mixed:
- Penis pumps are devices that involve creating a vacuum around the penis to draw blood into it. While these can create a larger erection immediately after use, they don’t appear to have much long-term impact on increasing penis size. (One small study found an average length increase of .3 cm over six months of use.) Furthermore, overuse of the device can damage the penis and eventually weaken erections. (As a side note, however, anecdotal evidence does suggest that pumping may be effective for trans men.)
- Hanging weights from the penis does not appear to cause enlargement. In fact, it may cause permanent damage to the tissues of the penis.
- Penis traction devices gradually stretch the penis over time, and they may actually cause some increase in penis size. Some studies have shown that dedicated use of particular penis traction devices have increased penis length by an average of about 2 cm (about ¾ of an inch) with minimal change or even a slight increase in girth.
If you are looking for a non-surgical penis size intervention, the evidence suggests that a penis traction device is your best bet both in terms of efficacy and safety. In fact, penis traction may be a better option than surgery for many men looking for a boost. You may want to undertake the use of such a device under the treatment of a doctor.
Penis Enlargement Surgery
Most penis enlargement surgeries involve cutting the penile suspensory ligament, the ligament that helps support the erect penis. This does cause the base of the penis to come forward from inside the body, potentially increasing the length of the penis by one-two inches. However, it also changes the angle of erection substantially and make erections much less stable. This may make maneuvering during sex much more difficult.
Surgeries to improve girth involve injecting fat from other parts of the body into the penis. However, this can result in a lumpy or uneven penis if the fat doesn’t settle completely evenly. Additionally, the fat may eventually reabsorb back into the body, undoing any increase in girth.
So the current common surgical modalities are not necessarily particularly effective and can cause unpleasant side effects. Additionally, as mentioned above, most men seeking surgical intervention are well within the normal range for penis size. Doctors typically only recommend surgical intervention for men with a micropenis. A micropenis is often defined as a penis that is 2 inches or shorter when erect.
With that said, a newer penis enlargement procedure involves inserting a silicone implant into the penis to increase length and girth. While it’s not widely available yet, it’s certainly possible that in the future penis implants will be as easily available and low-complication as breast implants. We aren’t really there yet, though.
The only totally effective and completely safe way to gain penis length is to lose weight. This is because extra weight you are carrying in your abdominal fat pad engulfs the base of the penis, causing it to appear shorter. If you lose that fat, you’ll re-gain that length. Of course, if you are already very trim, you probably don’t have much length to uncover.
On a related note, better cardiovascular health can also help improve the hardness of your erections. While this won’t literally enlarge your penile tissue, a harder erection can give the impression of a larger, girthier member. So hop on that treadmill!
Addressing Your Feelings About Penis Size
The most durable and lasting intervention for penis size anxiety, however, is therapy or counseling. A therapist trained to address sexuality issues can help you address any anxieties you have about your penis. If you have a warped sense of your own penis size and believe it’s much smaller than it is (a form of body dysmorphia sometimes termed “penile dysmorphic disorder”), a therapist can help you get a more realistic sense of your own size—and the sizes of others.
Perhaps even more importantly, a therapist can also help you move away from the idea that a smaller penis makes you less of a man or less of a lover. A therapist can help you to have a better and healthier relationship with your own penis and your own body and sexuality more generally. They can also give you strategies for navigating uncomfortable or potentially negative situations in dating and life more generally.
Whether it is 6.5 inches, 3 inches, curved, fat, skinny, or angled, your penis can be an asset instead of an adversary.
The Bottom Line: Is 6.5 Inches Good?
How big is a 6.5 inch penis? Well, according to the most up-to-date analysis of multiple studies, the average erect penis is about 5.2 inches long.
So is 6.5 inches small? Not at all—it’s actually in the top 5% of all penises in terms of length.
But is 6.5 inches a good size? This is more complicated. The truth is that “good penis size” is a complicated concept that’s laden with all kinds of subjective value judgments.
However, most women in heterosexual relationships are satisfied with the size of their partner’s penises. Additionally, the vast majority of women don’t consider penis length to be particularly important. This makes sense, because most women derive most of their sexual pleasure from external clitoral stimulation. This makes penis length not super-relevant to their sexual pleasure.
Gay men might be more prone to penis size discrimination in potential partners. However, regardless of your sexual orientation, it is possible to find someone who is perfectly satisfied with your penis and with you more holistically.
In our society, larger penises are associated with masculinity. This is an unfortunate cultural value that has warped many men’s views of their own penises. But no penis has more inherent worth or value than any other penis.
If you are feeling anxiety about your penis size, there are a number of things you can do to alleviate your anxieties. The best and most enduring thing you can do to address distress about your penis size, however, is to go to a therapist to create a healthier relationship with your member—even if it is not a hefty 6.5 inches long.
We can also help you learn more about intersex people.
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